I hate you, Kate DiCamillo

Ha! I knew that subject line would get your attention!

But, seriously, Kate, listen up.

First you go and write that Winn Dixie book that we all love. So now we think, okay, this newcomer Kate gal is gonna deliver some dang good realistic fiction with some funny stuff and some sad stuff and a preacher man and all. Can't wait for the next one, blah blah blah. (And, yeah, yeah....there was that sticker thing and that movie thing.)

But THEN you go and write that Despereaux book! I mean, what the heck, Kate? That's not realistic fiction! That's a rip-roaring good mouse adventure. (And yeah, yeah, there was another sticker thing and another movie thing and all.)

Do you stop there? Oh, no. You whip out that toy rabbit Tulane book with all those great stories woven together and stuff.

Then you toss in a few Mercy Watsons just to really keep us on our toes. (I mean, easy readers or middle grade, which is it gonna be, Katie?)

And I'm not even going to say the words Bink and Gollie. 

But, now, dear Katie, you have really gone and done it.

You wrote Flora and Ulysses.

A book so hilarious, so fresh, so whacko, crazy cuckoo wonderful.

So different.....

I mean, you're giving me literary whiplash here, Kate.

How am I ever supposed to predict what you're going to write for us next?

The only thing I can probably put my money on is that it will be great.

Cause that seems to be how you roll.

P.S. I don't really hate you. Writers never hate one another. (We might hate a copyeditor once in a while, but never a writer.) But in my next book, there might be a poor unfortunate cockroach named Kate who makes an ill-timed dash across the kitchen floor just as a heavy, steel-toed boot is coming down (hard). 

Just sayin'.